Picture this: you’re me, enjoying your whirlwind first-ever trip to the iconic Powell’s Books in Portland, and you spot a staff recommendation tag with the words “asexual lesbian” prominently featured. You are, in fact, an ace lesbian, so you’re certainly not used to accidentally finding representation in the bookstore.
Naturally, you immediately pick up the book in question.
The downside? In your excitement, you completely miss the fact that TikTok influencing is a major driver of the plot.
Put simply, this novel–the second in a series, which I did not realize before I picked it up but which wasn’t a real issue–follows Angela Gutierrez, a librarian in San Antonio who goes semi-viral on TikTok for sharing some of her experience of exploring her sexuality and coming to terms with her identity. Given the eager response she receives from her viewers, she sets out to create a city-wide scavenger hunt, with the winner winning her first kiss. And she recruits the cute bartender she’s been crushing on for years to help. Surely, this plan is airtight and they won’t fall in love or anything.
Look, I don’t inherently have anything against TikTok. I do typically find myself feeling jarred by repeated, overt references to specific social media platforms in novels, though. So, as I started reading, I was immediately a little sceptical of whether my interest would be maintained. In the end, I was interested enough to continue reading, but the heavy involvement of Angela’s TikTok stardom was a continual sticking point for me; viewer comments and responses to Angela’s videos are the frame through which a lot of the conflicts are presented, and as a result many of the conflicts feel eyerollingly contrived. We’re talking, “Ace girl exposed! She’s flirted with boys before!” Even conflicts that are set up in the real world, such as an old wound with her cousins that came to be through Angela’s high school attempts to appear “normal,” bleed over into TikTok exposes. I think Gamez does a good job of realistically bridging those conflicts to Angela’s platform and building up Angela as a person who really is bothered by her “dirty laundry” being aired in that way. I think it just wasn’t for me as a plot device in general.
The romance between Angela and the bartender, Krystal, is compelling. Gamez did a really great job of writing a story about this ace lesbian while naturally emphasizing to the reader that the experiences of people with identities on the asexual spectrum are hugely varied. I may not have been able to relate personally to some of Angela’s experiences and desires, but they still felt true to her identity even when some of her choices left my ace brain baffled. Something I really enjoyed was the inclusion of Angela’s early experiences with compulsory heterosexuality, and how they impacted her relationships with people around her, even her family. I related really strongly to the impacts her actions while trying to perform allo-heterosexuality had on her self esteem and on her relationships with those around her.
I also appreciated the way Krystal approached learning and understanding more about Angela’s experience of asexuality, and her openness to the idea that being ace doesn’t mean one is inherently uninterested in sexual experiences. (A relevant note: This is a spicy book, with multiple relatively explicit sex scenes. If that’s not what you’re looking for in your ace rep, pick up something else). I didn’t always agree with the choices the two of them made as they found their way together–especially against the backdrop of the TikTok scavenger hunt for Angela’s first kiss–but I found both characters layered and interesting, both together and separately.
All in all, this one wasn’t my favorite, but there were certainly many components I enjoyed, and I was thrilled to see a book with some ace lesbian representation! I’d recommend checking this one out if you’re interested in reading about less-represented identities, a little familial baggage, and some fun San Antonio cameos, and you don’t mind the heavy use of TikTok to propel the story.
